I was finally facing the root of my issues
I am a 29 year old alcoholic/drug addict, and I have been battling with addiction since I was about 13 years old. For many years, I thought that my life was manageable—up until about eight years ago when things started to really spiral out of control. I was doing any drug I could get my hands on and started to drink more once I was of legal age—alcohol became much easier to get than illicit drugs. I lived in denial of any problem for years because I was holding jobs and providing for my wife and kids. I didn’t think that I had a problem. I was a “functional addict”—at least that is what I thought. Slowly but surely, alcohol became more of a controlling factor in my life, and the consequences were beginning to compound as well. I was involved in several car accidents before I ever got my first DWI. Because of the lack of major consequences, I refused to accept the severity of my problem. Eventually I was convicted of two felonies and was placed on probation, and then got another DWI while on probation, which resulted in my placement in the Drug Court program and onto the road of sobriety. I was not working a program, merely going through the motions and staying sober through sheer willpower, which does not work for long. After my third relapse, I was sent to Bridge House for long term treatment. I was furious at first, indignantly standing firm in my belief that I did not belong in a program such as this. But I took suggestions and started working with a sponsor and actually listening to what my counselors had to say and slowly my attitude and perceptions started to change. Here I have learned some vital facts about myself and my life. Alcohol and other drugs were not my problem, I was my problem and the substance abuse was merely a symptom of the larger underlying issues. I was finally facing the root of my issues, the glaring character defects that make me want to use no matter what the cost to myself and those around me. I was able to face the fact that I was living in the grip of fears and an obscenely self-centered view of the world. I now know that I don’t have to live that way anymore. My journey here is not complete yet, but I know that when I finish the program here at Bridge House I will have a new outlook on life, as well as new ways to tackle old problems. I can now move on and up in life and be the man and father that I and my children deserve. I am thankful that there is a place such as this to help people such as myself that are deemed hopeless by many in society. We are not hopeless; there is help out there for those that are willing to accept it.
Shane